Simpsons quotes

[teamdiscoverychannel]

"Uhhhh, Mr. Simpson, in the Itchy and Scratchy CD-ROM is it possible to escape the dungeon without using the wizard key?"

[badgerman27]

What the hell are you nerds talking about.

[badgerman27]

Homer - "This is my son Bart. He owns a factory downtown."

[Nals]

Originally Posted by Flanders

The Simpsons are dying but I thought I would honor them with my 1000th post.

Ned: Now throughout history, when people get wood, they'll think of Trojans

Ned: If it's clear and yella', you've got juice there fella! If it's tangy and brown, you're in cider town

Ned: I think I may be coveting my own wife

Ned: I'm running for the cure.... to homosexuality

Ned: Why me, lord? I don't drink or dance or swear. I've even kept Kosher just to be on the safe side. I've done every thing the Bible's told me; even the stuff that contradicts the other stuff

Krusty the Clown: I could pull a better cartoon outta my aaa-ha-ha.....hey whoa!, wasn't that great kids?

Moe: Come on, don't take this so hard, Homer. You still got that
other kid, uh... Lisa. Let's, uh, take her out hunting tomorrow;
make her into a man.
Homer: Aw, she'd never go. She's a vegetarian.
Moe: Oh, geez! Homer, geez! You and Marge ain't cousins, are you?

i wasted my 1000 post on Keith Nichol.

[Spartacus81]

Homer: There, there boy. Crying won't bring your dog back. Unless your tears smell like dog food. So you can either sit there, eating can after can of dog food, until your tears smell SO much like dog food that your dog comes back...or you can go out and find your dog!

[MSUSmitty]

Homer reading computer screen: To continue press any key....where's the Any key???

[SpartanJimbo]

Homer (while building a grill): English side ruined! Must...use...French instructions! LE GRILLE?!? WHAT THE HELL IS THAT?!?

------

Homer (before drinking a beer): Expand my brain, learning juice!

[nettleman]

Marge: "Homer, your work called and they said if you don't come in tomorrow, don't bother coming in Monday."
Homer: "Woohoo! Four-day weekend!"
"Boy. do you want to change your name to Homer Junior? The kids can call you Hoju!"

"Just because I don't care doesn't mean I don't understand!!"

Homer to Aliens: "Please don't eat me! I have a wife and kids. Eat them!!!"

"Marge don't discourage the boy, weaseling out of things is important to learn. It's what seperates us from the animals...except the weasel."

"I'm not normally a praying man, but if you're up there, please save me Superman."

"Don't blame me, I voted for Kodos."

Homer's brain: "Use reverse psychology."
Homer: "Oh, that sounds too complicated."
Homer's brain: "Okay, don't use reverse psychology."
Homer: "Okay, I will!"

Lisa: "Dad you shouldn't wear glasses that weren't prescribed to you."
Homer: "Lisa just because you're ten feet tall doesn't mean you can tell me what to do."

"But Marge, I swear I didn't think you would find out."

[teamdiscoverychannel]

"But beware, this doll carries a terrible curse."
"That's bad."
"But it comes with a free frogurt."
"That's good."
"The frogurt is also cursed."
"That's bad."
"But it comes with a choice of topping."
"That's good."
"The toppings contain potassium benzoate."
".........."
"That's bad."
"Can I go now?"